A woman’s moon cycle  is a time of deep transformation.


Five days late, I was energetically on my darkest and heaviest moon that I’d had in a few years. I didn’t understand why I was in such a weird mood because normally my moon time is by far my most favorite time of the month. I am the most clear, radiant, and creative. I didn’t know what was up until it hit me like LIGHTNING!!! I was in need of sharing sacred sex with a trusted man. Sacred sex to me means love making in the most exquisite, conscious, tantric way possible.

In the last few months I have been enjoying my life as a single woman. But for one good made up reason or another, I have not made an effort to see conscious lovers regularly. These good ol’ made up reasons have served their purposes such as protection, healing and clarity. Most importantly, before I embark on sharing the most intimate and powerful energy I know, I want to make sure I am completely clear on the chosen beloved. Sex is super sacred to me and there are always consequences in how I share and exchange sexual energy, immediately, and over the course of life.

Before this moon, I’ve been clear that I need to have more conscious tantric practices WITH like minded partners/lovers in my life. Kundalini Yoga or white tantra could only offer so much for my spirit. It’s time to merge with a chosen beloved. Spirit has been guiding me to this realization, and so inevitably on my moon, this truth intensensly showed its darkest shadow to remind me that there is a light on the other side creating this shadow in the first place.

My friend of 9 months hugged me good bye as I smelt my “bloody” (literally -not to be confused with the english slang) blanket that I wrapped around me after sitting and laying on it because I bleed free, without the use of any products inside of me. I couldn’t help but get a powerful hit of feminine magnesium, iron, ancient rituals and potent elixirs. I got high. The best kind of high I know. As we pulled away from each others arms he boldly commented, something along the lines of, “I love making love to a woman on her cycle because I don’t need to worry about spilling my seed… and in fact it turns me on for that reason.” Surprised and confused I said something along the lines of, “Awesome. Good to know.” It was a short and sweet response, just to say something, to play it safe because what I really wanted to say was, “Uhmm, you kinda just turned me on!”

On my way home, I left confused because I didn’t know know if I really needed to have my “‘feminine space” after all or if I was running away from the invitation that my body was yearning for, for the first time during a sacred period of taboo mind fucks. It is after all a moon cycle ritual, to do whatever I want and to have feminine space but this time it wasn’t clear what I needed the most. On top of that, my girlfriends were only available for feminine time the following day!  I mean it’s been 2-3 months since I last exchanged physical sexual energy on a hot steamy night in the Mexican jungle upside down facing the tropical Pacific Ocean and I am used to making love anywhere between 14 and 28 hours a week, I know…. insane, right?! I am now transitioning into the conscious frequency that my body REALLY needs, rather than simply indulging 24/7 because I can and forgetting the other ways my body also loves connecting with source! Though I will always be grateful for the Amritawaterfalls and spills that I bless Mother Earth with, I do believe life is an epic dance of divine balance. Speaking of which, I will not be surprised at all if it starts raining again this week in LA because I believe Amrita evokes the rain on this physical third dimensional plane.

Arriving at my sanctuary, I realized that I wanted to make love on my moon more than anything. But could I really share one of the most intimate moments with an amazing friend?! A friend that I recently have been starting to teach and practice tantra with. In just 10 days, our lives have been completely transformed. At my insistance, he gave up smoking and drinking to become clear before our first session and now he has stayed clear and clean for 4 1/2 weeks after the first initiation, and I’m expressing myself professionally in ways that I never have before in my entire life! I believe any blocks can be transformed with the conscious use of sexual energy. But STILL, the only times I have ever felt comfortable having sacred moon sex was when I’ve been in a long term committed relationship.

Left in wonder and amazement at that possibility, the YES became more clear and evident. I just didn’t know how to approach this situation because I had a lot of “limiting stuff” coming up, that was depriving me from honoring the needs of my spiritual body. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned throughout my life, it’s that whenever I do honor my body, with what it REALLY needs, everything shifts and I’m suddenly back to my balanced and most empowered self.

One of those beliefs was; could I really have sacred moon sex with someone I’m not in a “committed” relationship with?” Well I guess this would be my first time but who is to say this IS NOT my current reality of a committed relationship/partnership? After all this is a sweet and powerful relationship that is sourced in deep love, integrity, respect, authenticity, vulnerability, and the list goes on. So what the hell?! Why not?! Who am I to dismiss the precious relationships in my life that are here in flesh and blood to nourish my body and soul on multiple levels, simply because they don’t fit neatly into the inherited idea of “the one beloved?” The beloved and divine is within each one of us after all!

I released the belief of needing to be in a deep romantic partnership and began walking towards my bliss of moon intimacy aka “moonstasy”. This moon bliss continuously shifts and redefines itself over time. It guided me into having one of the most exquisite tantric love making sessions ever with a new conscious lover! It was sooo good on so many levels…simply the best because my body was in need of that intimate physical bond with someone that I could trust myself with and during such a potent time of manifestation and transformation. A time that smells likes home and feels like I’ve been doing this moon ritual all my life.

Such a potent time for clarity, menstruation is the perfect time time to make an offering to the divine and worship the divine within the beloved. It’s no coincidence that this powerful time of healing, transformation, and manifestation has been tainted with societal taboos, dirty stains of male/female struggle, and awkward innocent moments. A true mind fuck if you ask me. I’m not interested in mind fucks. I’m interested in liberated soulful minds that blow, bliss and bless me away into the infinite and ecstatic union of exquisite tantric love making. A mind that becomes one with my body and spirit, and connects me to my most primal emotions, that are released in an exquisite exhalation of  limiting beliefs and delightfully savored in an inhalation of nurturing and heavenly righteous affirmations. This is the mystical, orgasmic breath of life itself, after all.

Now that I’m on the other side of honoring my moontasy, (moon + intimacy + ecstasy), I am so blessed and blissed out, into being another woman, boldly expressing the need to share the freedom, power and transformation of this time once again. As a woman who dares to dance with freedom, I challenge you to continue to redefine your authentic voice and needs around taboo related topics. If you feel inspired, please share this story, it could liberate a world of beloveds!

Here are the tips of the week:

For womb-man

  • Make a divine offering on your moon time!
  • The YONI, or vagina is ALWAYS pure consciousness.
  • The yoni gives birth to dreams especially on a woman’s moon.
  • Share your moontasy period with someone you trust yourself with.
  • Honor your yoni or the yoni of your beloved with what it really needs.
  • The yoni is your temple and you are the priestess of your temple and only you know what is best for you.
  • Prepare yourself for your moon time. These are 13 rituals I do on the first day of my moon:

For knights

I absolutely LOVE when a man communicates his desires, it gives me the opportunity to feel into what my body really needs.

  • Be bold in your penetrative communication and be conscious of a woman’s boundaries and where she is at on her cycle.
  • Lover her on her moon like you would any other day (actually a little extra is highly recommended) and ALWAYS remember this is a delicate and powerful time for her. You can either be the knight on her team, or her worst enemy during this intense time.
  • Ask her for what she needs such as what kind of berries, beverage, chocolate, candles, flowers she is craving during her ceremony time or anything that will soothe her during this time.
  • Support your beloved with what she feels is best for her (this could be alone time) which is perfect because knights need their brotherhood time too!;)


Supporting each other in making the most out of such a delicate and powerful time is life transforming all by itself. The Yoni is after all pure consciousness so honor the temple during its most potent time. Period!!


Love making rituals on a women’s moon cycle are not anything new but rather something new re-emerging now into the mainstream a bit more (Thank god!) Rituals have been recorded in ancient texts and scriptures, and have been practiced by hundreds of traditions, cultures, and tribes that have honored this time with the upmost respect. Check out this link that has a list of different tribes who have used menstruation as a time for rituals and transformation. http://www.thefountainoflife.org/sacred-menstruation-reclaiming-our-wise-blood/


I am so blessed to have a deep connection with my body, tantric teachers who dare to be bold in the face of taboo related topics, students to impact their lives forever, and knights that inspire the world out of me. I am so grateful for radiant women and courageous knights who balance the disharmony between the polarities of sexes and rock my world. I invite you to continue dancing your way into exquisite and ecstatic love making on and off the sheets, wherever you go, whenever that is, and with whoever you wish.


If you’re a woman interested in claiming the your most orgasmic empowered life or a knight interested in grounding your sexual energy please visit www.ixchelsandivel.com/breakthrough.


In Exquisite Bliss,

iX-CheL Sandivel


iX-CheL Sandivel is an intimacy artist and transformational coach. She is living in exotic tropical paradise where she leads Tantra retreat intensives. She’s qualified by the oldest school of tantra in the west, as a Source Tantra Yoga Associate & certified Advanced Tantra Educator. She’s most known for her “Sensual Surrender Play Shop for Women” where women learn to embrace their creative life force energy, and to play a dominant role at the “Dakini Domme Knight Masquerade.”  Follow iX-Chel on Instagram at @ixchel_sandivel

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